One of my 12 or so loyal readers pointed out today that the blog “seems less than total these days.”
Indeed. I shall remedy that soon.
Meantime, I ran across two things that are really awesome. They are “both parodies”:http://www.veryveryhappy.blogspot.com/2004_05_23_veryveryhappy_archive.html#108553067569781729 of “this jackass.”:http://instapundit.com/ They date from 2004, but I just found out about them from “LGM.”:http://lefarkins.blogspot.com/2007/11/missing-bloggers.html
I don’t blog a whole lot about the denizens of Wingnuttistan, but these made me laugh out loud.
Here they are, in full:
THE MEDIA’S WAR ON THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION continues unabated. Recent events have combined with the media’s anti-Bush agenda to paint a misleadingly dark picture of Iraq. If you received all your news from CNN, MSNBC, CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox News, The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Times, The Army Times, The Chicago Tribune, the Chicago Sun-Times, USA Today, the Sacremento Bee, the San Jose Mercury News, The Orlando Sentinel, The Detroit Free Press, The Detroit News, The Lansing State Journal, the Dallas Morning News, the Boston Globe, the Houston Chronicle, UPI, Reuters, or the Associated Press, you would be under the impression that things are pretty bleak in Iraq.
Fortunately, Michael Ubaldi has several blog posts explaining how good it actually is over there. Just keep scrolling.
posted at 05:23 PM by Glenn Reynolds
*WARNING:* This one’s a bit raunchy.
A NOT-PARTICULARLY-SHY READER EMAILS:
_At the bar the other night, my girlfriends and I were talking about some of the law professors at our school (we attend a major southern university). One of them mentioned how she had heard that the most common injuries suffered by southern law professors are complications due to falls caused by tripping over their own larger-than-average penises. Who better to confirm or deny this than you?_
Indeed. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I’ve never had any problems maneuvering around my enormous cock, although there have been a few close calls. It’s just something you learn to live with, although, like my synesthesia, it does allow me to focus on other problems while my tremendous wang completes mundane tasks.
Update: Another reader has a question as well:
_I too have a monstrous johnson, as do most of my Republican friends. My liberal friends, on the other hand, refuse to talk to me when I ask them about it. This leads me to believe that they are, shall we say, light in the drawers. So, my question is, does Republicanism cause one’s equipment to grow, or do people with massive schlongs naturally tend to be Republicans?_
I don’t think there is necessarily a causal relationship – after all, I am not a Republican, yet my gargantuan tool is, so far as I know, without equal.
Another Update: Alan Colmes emails:
_First of all, big fan of your site. Hannity sent this to me, and I figured I’d add my two cents. While I’ll grant you that conservative dick is quite a bit larger, on average, than liberal dick, it is important to bear in mind that size doesn’t matter, so long as you know how to use it. Not that many of us do, I know, but still…_
That’s what they all say.
Yet Another Update: Tim Blair, on his website:
_Having repeatedly licked The Professor’s balls over the last two years, I am in a position to say that the hardest part of doing so is holding up his elephantine peter in order to keep it from flopping down on your head, causing a mild concussion._
Heh.
Still More: This is getting out of hand. Virginia Postrel is demanding pictures. Lileks wants collectible porcelain figurines.